What Do I Have To Do?

Sometimes, I have to wonder what is wrong with the world when a loyal, faithful, honest, and intelligent person can not be deserving of finding happiness in a loving relationship. I feel I'm deserving of happiness, companionship.

I have no clue what I'm doing when it comes to relationships. I have horrible luck with guys. I wasted the time where most people find the love of their life waiting for a guy to come around and figure out I'm who he wanted to be with. I wasted a third of my life on a dead end. Now I'm glad I ended it, and I definitely learned from it, but I am ready for the next phase in my life.

I'm a selfless person. I get more upset when someone wrongs my loved ones than when I'm wrong. Just tonight I was in tears because my mom and stepdad were upset and being wronged. And maybe because I'm not selfish, I don't stand up for myself enough or fight hard enough. I waste more time going back to my past and hoping I'll be able to fix things with guys I neglected or didn't fight for while I was waiting on the other guy. A picture was posted from Junior year Homecoming Pep Rally on Facebook and I'm wearing his football practice jersey. I also have blonde hair and want to Photoshop both out.

So tell me, what do I need to do to find a real man?

PS - When someone does something for you out of the good of their heart, don't be a brat and make expectations that they need to live up to, to make you even happier. If you are given or gifted something, then you need to appreciate what you are given and don't be a selfish bastard. That is all.

Peace & Love